C-Section Madness

As I'm sure you read in my last post, Why My Wife is Wonderful, my little girl is breech and we have to have a C-section on Feb 24th. 

As a fun bonus for all of you trivia nerds like me out there, the Cesarean section is not named after every one's favorite Roman dictator, Julius Caesar.  No one is certain, but the prevailing theory is that it refers to a Roman law called "Lex Caesarea", which allowed the baby to be cut out of its mother's womb if she died before giving birth.  But I digress. . .

My wife has been so dead set against a C-section that I honestly haven't prepared for it.  So now that I have 14 days to prepare, I am re-reading all the baby books I read months ago to bone up on the c-section. . . sections.  (Sorry, no pun intended)

But then I thought to myself, "Wait!  You have access to the awesome power of the Internet, why not wield that power to learn all about the ins and outs of this?"  Surely my 6 readers must have some insight.

I know the basics about the procedure and the recovery thanks to our new OB and the multimillion $ baby book industry, but I was wondering if anyone had any helpful tips on this one?  Any inside stuff I should know that the books or docs don't tell you?

Thanks everybody,

Why My Wife is Wonderful

My little girl, who has yet to make her arrival, is already giving my wife and I a hard time.  She was set to make her grand appearance somewhere around March 3rd but because she is breech and refuses to turn we had to make some changes.

We got up nice and early and went to the hospital in order to see if a doctor could turn her.  But alas, she was crafty like her old man and managed to elude being flipped around.  My wife and I both had hoped we would be able to avoid a C-section, but unfortunately we had to schedule one for the 24th.

I know the Mrs. was upset about having to have the c-section.  She had really wanted to have a nautral birth, and didn't want a c-section on our first to get in the way of being able to have a normal birth down the road.  To be honest I expected her to be very upset, but she handled everything really well.

This situation is just the most recent of many that constantly remind me why my wife is so wonderful.  Since  most of your don't know her, here's a quick breakdown on why she is so great:

  • She is able to deal with anything thrown at her:  Trust me, having me as a husband is no picnic.  While I may seem awesome and bad ass from the outside I come with a whole host of issues. My wife has stood by my side through thick and a whole lot of thin in our years together.
  • She can make me laugh like no one else:  Her laugh makes me laugh.  The finest specimen is when she explodes in laughter when no one else does in a movie theater.
  • She is everything I am not:  She's organized where I am chaotic.  She focuses on the process while I focus on the goal.  She is calm where I am wild.  She is sensitive when I am oblivious.
  • She is a loving and caring person who will be a great mother!  She knows more about babies than I think I ever will. . .

I am lucky to have her in my life.  She brings out the best in me; even when I really would prefer that she didn't.

With all the last minute stuff going on with the baby it's easy to forget about  making my wife feel special.  Special thanks to the guys over at Dad-Blogs who are running a Valentine's Day contest; reminding me I can't forget to be a husband just because I'm going to be a dad.

Family tradition

I'm bummed. . .

No, I'm not a Cardinal's fan.  The game actually turned out to be pretty good.  I had a great time at my in-law's watching the game, despite my wife jamming her thumb in my eye (she jokingly tried to pull the brim of my hat down and instead poked my ocular cavity).  No permanent harm done. . . I think

No I'm not bummed out because any of the above; I am bummed out because today marks the beginning of the longest football-less time period of the year.  I'm a die-hard Oakland Raider fan, so my season was over before it even started, but at least I had the joy of watching good football (from other teams) every weekend.

So what am I going to do now?  I can't watch baseball on TV. It's like old people having sex; . . S. . L. . O. . W  Basketball doesn't blow my skirt up either.  It's fast paced which is nice, but you don't get the same kind of strategic playing as you see in football.  Also with both of them there is just too many games.  One single game has little effect in the overall outcome of the season, especially early on.  Hockey (eh)?  Sure the fights are cool and it looks awesome in HD, but let's be honest; it's soccer on ice.

My only option is wait until my sport comes back in early fall.  The draft will give me the fix I need to last until then.  Then like I do every year I will get my hopes up that the Raider's will pull their heads out of their asses and maybe have a winning record this year. . . and like every year (for the last 6 years) I will be disappointed by the 1st game, angry by the 8th, and could give a shit by the 16th. Like an abused spouse, I write them off, accept them back with their promises of change, get my hopes up for a new era in our relationship and then BAM!  Another black eye. . .

So why would anyone subject themselves to this roller coaster of sports emotion?  Simple; I never had the choice.  It was a life I was born into.  My mom is a Raider fan, my dad is a Raider fan, my step mom is a Raider fan. . .I just grew up that way. 

And while I have every intention of making my daughter's life filled with joy and happiness, I have started her down the path of perpetual sports let down. . .I have bought her a Raider's outfit!  The second thing I bought my little girl was a complete infant Raiders get-up.  Hat, booties and onesie all embroidered with every one's favorite patch wearing pirate!

Luckily, my wife and her family are die hard Husker fans, and have very few opinions on professional football, so there is no parental/pro-football conflict.  The first time my wife felt her move was at a Husker game, and of course the family has bought her plenty of Big Red apparel.  So it's been decided.  On Saturdays she will root for the Huskers, and on Sundays the Raiders.

Being a Raider fan is not easy, and my heart does go out for my little girl.  It's a life filled with heart break, let down but also the occational win (they always do just well enough to keep you coming back).  But it's a family tradition, and one I want her to be a part of.

What sports traditons have you passed along to your kids?  Did they stick, or did they revolt and root for someone else? 

Until next time I'll be here. . .counting down the days until the pig skin returns.

Packing a Bag for the Hospital

My wife and I have a calendar dry erase board in our kitchen, and when she redid it recently the baby's due date was on there!  I had another "Oh crap this is real moment".

Even though the baby is pegged to arrive on March 3rd, she could make an early arrival as soon as February 1st and still be full term.  With that frightening notion at hand, my wife and I put the finishing touches on the nursery and started to pack a bag for the hospital.

My wife is extremely organized and very resourceful so she of course had a spread sheet set up with suggestions on what to bring that she had downloaded from somewhere.  We went down the list filling a suitcase and making notes of things we needed.  I guess I didn't even think about it, but there was a special section just for me!  It suggested I bring:

  • a change of clothes
  • toiletries
  • a magazine or book to read

I also high jacked some of the things from the list for me to be in charge of:

  • Being the audio/visual dork in our relationship I put myself in charge of the video and digital cameras.
  • change for the vending machine / money for food

This seems like a very short list, but I assume that I will be busy calming my wife, massaging her back, getting her ice chips etc and won't have time to read or worry about anything else.  So I am turning to my loyal readers (all 5 of you) for any suggestions on what to bring to the hospital with me.

What did you have that was a life saver?  What did you forget that would have been great to have?

Thanks in advance,

Raising Daughters @ Discovering Dad

In these last 6 weeks I am just soaking up as much advice, tips and knowledge that I can from anywhere I can find it. I came across a great post at Discovering Dad on Raising Daughters. If you have or are expecting a little girl, these are some great tips.

Check it out!

If you have any advice or tips please feel free to post them here too. I need all the help I can get!

Baby’s Fists of Fury

Ever since I first found out I was going to be a dad I get these moments where it all hits home. It's the strangest thing; I know that my wife is pregnant, I know there is a baby in there.  I have seen ultrasound pictures and I have even felt my little girl move.  But in the process of just getting through the days and weeks you don't always think about it.

Don't get me wrong, I think about my wife and my baby everyday.  I think about how to be a good dad, husband and person so my daughter will be as happy as she can be.  I read every book I can that gives advice on how to be a good dad, read blogs constantly and research everything I don't get.  I have been eating better and working out more so I can try and lose the 20 extra pounds I have been carrying around for the last couple of years (Thank you chili cheese fries and bud light) all to be healthier for my wife and kid.

Like anything else you adapt and it becomes just "how it is".  My wife of course is painfully aware of the changes in her, but besides the side effects and problems she has I notice the stomach getting bigger and that's about it.  In a lot of ways it's not as real to me as is it to her.  Until last night. . .

My wife and I are sitting on the couch last night and she says really quietly "Hey come look at this."  She has her laptop open so I think she is just going to show me some stupid Fwd email or one of the birthing videos online.  I put my book down and leaned over by her and she points at a spot on her stomach.

Am I looking for spot on her shirt?  Then all of a sudden the shirt moved!  Holy crap!  I can see the direct effects of my baby's movements.  My little girl was going all Cain from Kung Fu on the inside of my wife's uterus! 

I had another "Oh, this is really real" moment.  Every day that we get closer to D-Day, March 3rd, it gets a little more tangible.  Maybe it's a form of denial (not just a river in Egypt anymore).   Or maybe I don't see myself as a dad; it seems like not too long ago I was pouring Jack Daniels into a beer bong on top of a house boat.  So every now and then I have to be reminded every now and then that this is real and imminent. 

Has anyone else gone through this?  How did you deal with it?

Check out this post

I came upon this site this morning and the post really hit home. 

It's called "The 7 Habits of Highly Succesful Fathers" and is definitely worth a read for any new dads out there.

More simple advice

Advice comes at you all the time when you have a pregnant wife. Friends, family and perfect strangers often feel the need to give you little pearls of wisdom. A lady in Wal-Mart talked to me about the third trimester and child birth for 10 minutes while my wife was in the bathroom. Sometimes you get great advice and sometimes you just smile and nod and think, "Wow, you are all kinds of crazy!"

As we enter the third trimester I find myself looking for more simple advice to help me through being a dad and raising my daughter. Honestly, I still really don't understand women, so how am I supposed to raise a little one? Through happenstance I got some advice from a combination of unlikely places and while a bit unconventional, I think it fits.

I listen to the Adam Corolla radio show every morning through Internet radio, and he has a theory about being a good dad to a daughter; Your only job is to keep them off the stripper pole. That's it! If you're daughter isn't serving up lap dances you've done a good job being a dad. You can also use it as a litmus test; By doing or not doing X will my daughter be pushed towards the stripper pole?

Yeah it's simplistic and doesn't address all of the intricate issues that exist between dads and daughters but I think it's a great overlying theory.

The other day my best friend Jason sent me one of those emails with fake motivational posters. One fit the Stripper Pole theory of daughter raising all too well. . .

strippersNow I'm not saying strippers are bad people. Everyone has to make a buck, and I'm not one to judge. Nor am I saying stripper's dads are horrible dads devoid of love. But you have to face the fact: If your daughter is taking her clothes off for money, somewhere along the line, no matter how much you loved her, you f*cked up buddy!

It's the same with people who have substance abuse issues. My wife and I love the show Intervention on A&E (it makes me feel better about the problems in my life). As they tell their life stories either there is divorce or some form of abuse that leads to these people using drugs and alcohol. As it begins we'll say to each other "So you think it was divorce or molestation?" It's sad but true.

The actions of mom and dad have huge effects on their kids. In order to be more educated about the subject I bought a book on the relationships between dads and daughters, I'll let you know all about it in a future post. Until then, I am sticking with the Stripper Pole Theory.